Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation creativity and change
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation creativity and change” – Brene Brown
Great quote for any organizational leader. It all starts there!
Narcissism and Successful Leaders
Narcissism and world class achievement have an interesting relationship and when we think of those who excel on the world stage. It’s really easy to conjure up a story that they have a rich and deep inner belief that they can be the absolute best in the world.
Many very successful people don’t have that complete self-absorbed away of believing that they are the only or the absolute best in their craft as a matter of fact, most folks that we’ve spoken to have revealed a deep sense of humility and so, it’s for those that hold that belief that the world revolves around me because I am that important and that special is when my intent to start to attuned to the concept of narcissism
Narcissism is not that complicated but there are some diagnostic stuff that psychologists run through but it’s excessive self-centered vanity and the lack of regard for others that are some of the hallmarks of Narcissism and we all can be a bit self-absorbed or needy and have some vanity to us and we can display narcissistic behavior from time to time but that’s not what this is about,
it’s that deep sense of grandiosity that is so pervasive that impairs their daily functioning their relationship themselves, their relationships with others, and that’s what it’s about so
Narcissism is the name for the Greek myth of Narcissus. He was a Hunter who when he saw his own reflection in water, he fell in love with it and he didn’t realize it was a reflection and so he stared at it literally in untill he died.
The way that I like to simplify this concept of Narcissism is that the person can’t tell the difference between himself and everyone around him or her. Everyone becomes a reflection of him or her, and it gives them the right to use other people as extensions of their own self-worth
Narcissism only becomes a problem to the person when the consequences become realized.
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#1 way to increase team performance is by creating psychological safety.
#1 way to increase team performance is by creating psychological safety. Google spent 3yrs figuring this out. Use it as your competitive advantage.
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Business Relationships SuperCharger #2
Here is your #2 business relationships supercharger (from my book Social Wealth)…
Supercharger #2: Seeing Every Opportunity
Relationship SuperCharger #1
I’m going to share with you ways you can supercharge your business relationships quickly. Here is #1.
Supercharger #1: Putting People First
Why Your Stories Are Holding Back From Career Success
We form our own reality from the BS stories we make up.
We’re conspiracy theorists and a huge ball of emotions.
Once you embrace that truth, it’s way easier to live your life.
Unless something is 1+1=2 it’s a story!
Let it go.
Example: Leader of a group asks a question. You answer it. The person across from you rolls their eyes. You think (one) that person doesn’t like me, (two) they don’t like what I’m saying and/or (three) something about me bothers them. Well, all you know is they rolled their eyes. That’s it. You filled in the rest of the information. They could have remembered something they didn’t do. Got a text from a sick kid. Had a client yell at them.
It’s all a story you created in your mind. That’s your reality now unless you address it with that person.
It’s only TRUE because you MADE IT TRUE!
Make sense?
Here is what you do to resolve the story and write a new ending:
You address that privately with them by saying, “The story in my head is that….” That’s it. That disarms them immediately because of how you led into the conversation.
That’s “Why Your Stories Are Holding Back From Career Success!”
Cheers!
PS: Want to clear out the BS stories that are holding you back? Contact me for coaching options (including a free 20 mins where I’ll help you solve your biggest challenge).
How to Build an Effective Team for Your Business
“Talent wins games, but intelligence and teamwork win championships.”– Michael Jordan
In the game of business, everyone wants to win championships. But there is more to winning than getting a group of people into a conference room. You have to know how to build an effective team from the ground up.
Here are three simple ways to build and nurture a strong team for your business.
Establish Yourself As A Leader
You can’t have a strong team if you’re not a strong leader. Each member of your team should know that you’re the leader. But being a leader doesn’t mean lording your hierarchy over the rest of your team. It means listening, understanding, and guiding your team to success.
Start by doing some introspection. Build awareness of how you approach your leadership duties.
Are you willing to listen to suggestions? How do you communicate with your team? Do you stand ready to answer their questions or do you outsource that task?
INC.com put together a great leadership checklist to inspire your introspection session, so start there.
See what your answers reveal and work towards improving your leadership skills
Turning Fear into Fire (Quotes by Audra Lorde)
From time-to-time, I’ll share quotes with you in areas that really impact me and others I come in contact with. Fear has been a really big theme lately with clients and friends. I really like this quote on Fear by poet, Audre Lorde, in her book A Burst of Light: and Other Essays (and from brain pickings).
“Seventeen days before she turned fifty, and six years after she underwent a mastectomy for breast cancer, Lorde was told she had liver cancer. She declined surgery and even a biopsy, choosing instead to go on living her life and her purpose, exploring alternative treatments as she proceeded with her planned teaching trip to Europe. In a diary entry penned on her fiftieth birthday, Lorde reckons with the sudden call to confront the ultimate fear:
I want to write down everything I know about being afraid, but I’d probably never have enough time to write anything else. Afraid is a country where they issue us passports at birth and hope we never seek citizenship in any other country. The face of afraid keeps changing constantly, and I can count on that change. I need to travel light and fast, and there’s a lot of baggage I’m going to have to leave behind me. Jettison cargo.”
Here is another quote from her:
“Survival isn’t some theory operating in a vacuum. It’s a matter of my everyday living and making decisions. How do I hold faith with sun in a sunless place? It is so hard not to counter this despair with a refusal to see. But I have to stay open and filtering no matter what’s coming at me…”
Introverts’ Best Practice Guide To Meeting People And Building Relationships
Check out my article on Young Upstarts on a fun and easy ways for introverts to meet great people both personally and professionally. You can still meet a lot of people (and ultimately the best people for you) if you manage the process differently. That’s why I created these six easy steps for introverts.
Short Story Long Podcast Appearance (Top 50 Podcast on Apple Podcasts)
It was an honor to be on this fantastic podcast, Short Story Long. Chris “Drama” Pfaff was a star on the hit MTV Show, Rob & Big, and now has a VERY successful apparel and clothing line. His podcast is downloaded more than 500,000 times per month, making it one of the most popular ones on Apple Podcasts. You can listen to it here, watch the video above, and read the transcript below.
In the podcast on Short Story Long we discuss the following:
- Why understanding your patterns creates massive business breakthroughs
- How to eliminate your own blind spots and patterns that sabotage your success and your team’s success, and why it is the #1 way to maximize your performance and leadership over every else you can do
- Why leadership training and development is broken and doesn’t work
- Why your level of self-awareness is always higher than your social awareness, and that only 5% or less of people are high functioning on the self-awareness scale
- How to build an extraordinary team with no money, and outflank your competition (even companies 5x or 10X bigger than you).
- Why Google’s Project Aristotle is the secret to build a great team, holding effective brainstorming and elevating strategic thinking on a team- and company-level
- Why psychological safety is the foundation for all great teams even though no one really does it other than Google (and how you can do it for free.)
- And much more…
Jason Treu: At the end of the day, if we don’t have some accountability, you screwed.
Speaker 1: The hardest part is figuring out what you want to master.
Chris Pfaff: Just focus on your product.
Speaker 2: Can you tell somebody that they suck?
Chris Pfaff: You got to just go for it.
Speaker 3: This is exactly I want to do for a living.
Speaker 4: You can’t even tell somebody that their breath stick.
Chris Pfaff: Okay, ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Short Story Long. We have a very special guest today. His name is Jason Treu. Jason, thanks for coming in.
Jason Treu: Hey, thanks for having me in the show today.
Chris Pfaff: Of course.
Jason Treu: Fun to fly out here today and …
Chris Pfaff: Did you fly out here just for this?
Jason Treu: I had some other things but …
Chris Pfaff: Yeah, we’ll say just for this.
Jason Treu: Just for this. Just for you.
Chris Pfaff: I feel special. Yeah.
Jason Treu: You’re so special.
Chris Pfaff: Yes. I’m really excited because you are an executive coach and I mean we’ll get into all of it, but I’m really interested in what you do and I think that for me, I’m 31 years old, I’ve had a business for close to 10 years now. I had always obviously heard about coaching and life coaching and executive coaching, all this different stuff and I will say that for a long time, I mean born and raised in Ohio, didn’t go to college and maybe my brain was a little turned off to these things, but I always thought it was just, I don’t know, not for me or didn’t really understand what it even was and whatever. It wasn’t until I actually did an interview with somebody who now is a really good friend of mine named Cavion who does a lot of life coaching type stuff.
Chris Pfaff: After his podcast, he said, “Hey man, that was so cool and there was so many people that listened to that. Let me give you a couple sessions for free.” I said, “All right, I’ll do it. I’ll answer whatever questions you asked me, I’ll listen to your advice.” I mean even just his perspective and his outside knowledge on my life and what I’m doing right and wrong was really, really useful and that …
Jason Treu: What did you learn?
