Here’s a good article to spur a discussion on the difference between giving, taking and matching. It’s focused on parenting, but it can be equally applied in the workplace.
Adam Grant has an excellent book on this topic, Give and Take, I read it many years ago when it first came out. I’ve also have the privilege to speak to Adam several times over the years.
The key with giving is to have boundaries and priorities. Then you can give freely without the burden of a certain set of expectations.
Why does this matter? Building great relationships is like a bank account. You have to make deposits before you can make withdrawals. So when you lead with giving you can speed up the relationship building process.
The challenge can be not everyone will reciprocate. But there is no way to know that before you do an act of giving.
Self-sacrifice by harming yourself or allowing yourself to be taken advantage isn’t generosity. It’s actually selfish & self-inflicting pain.
Selflessness isn’t the issue. That obviously can be good. It’s the application of selflessness.
There is a TON of research that shows if a manager checks-in once a week with their employees their performance typically will significantly improve over bi-weekly or less. It makes complete sense when you think about it.
Why? Here are seven reasons why weekly check-ins with employees matter.
Show you care
Help them stay on track and prioritize what’s most important
Help them remove obstacles and roadblocks
Provide feedback and support
Challenge their thought processes and help them see better strategies, solutions, and tactics.
Results from performance reviews won’t be a surprise
Increase employee retention because 75% of employee quit because of poor managers and 90% of employees state their relationship is a top factor to stay at their company (and with their performance).
But this it depends on how the manager engages with their employees and the questions they ask. Weekly check-ins alone don’t ensure success.
So the next question that naturally arises is: What should a manager ask?
Here are four questions that you can go through in 10 minutes or less. It will ensure priority alignment and maximizes the chances for success that week.
What are your top three priorities for the week (and why)?
What’s going well with them?
What are your challenges? Where are you stuck?
What specifically can I do to help you?
Here are six additional questions managers can also use incorporate with their employees.
1) “What’s the best use of our time
Or “What’s top
of mind for you right now?”
2) “What does your ideal outcome(s) look like for the week?”
3) “What do you think is the best course of action for each priority?”
4) “Are you unclear about anything?”
5) “Do you have enough/right resources?”
6) “What was the most useful part of our conversation today?”
Can I pick your brain is one the worst questions ever. Why? It’s vague. It doesn’t tell the other person what you want. They can’t prepare. They don’t know if it’s worth their time to do it.
So chances are the person won’t reply or will decline to meet.
Have an agenda, questions and goals. State clearly what you want, time commitment, location, etc. To significantly increase your chances, I’d ask for 10-15 minutes. If the conversation is going well, no one will stop it. But you give the other person a clear, quick and easy out. And respect their time too and honor the 10-15 minutes. You’d be amazed what you can do in a short period of time.
Frank Agin, founder and president of AmSpirit Business Connections and host of Networking Rx, interviews Jason Treu (@jasontreu), a culture change and engagement expert for executives, managers, employees, and business owners and the best-selling author of Social Wealth: How To Build Extraordinary Relationships, which has sold more than 60,000 copies.
Podcast interview w/ Jason Treu on why and how leaders must build self-awareness and social awareness if they want to create high performance organizations.
Jason talks about key concepts to understand when it comes to creating a high-performing culture, and what specific actions leaders and organizations can take, regardless of size, to quickly create an extraordinary culture. At the foundation of these concepts and actions are building trust, creating psychological safety, and open communication that strengthens interpersonal relationships. These are just a few of a the topics that we touch on in our discussion, and I can’t recommend this episode to my listeners highly enough! Jason was a great guest and I look forward to connecting with him again soon!